Several years ago my friend Emma Veritas (creator of the “School of Wild Authenticity” and my co-host on the “Full Heart Free Voice” podcast), shared a blog written by Asia Suler “Nice Girls vs. Kind Women” (which you can read here).  At the time, Asia’s words  resonated in a way I hated to admit.

“Becoming, and remaining a nice girl is a kind of malnutrition to the soul of a woman.“ 

“At it’s root, the very word “nice” is something that is defined by others. One does not declare oneself to be nice. Nice is a title that is bestowed upon you by those you have pleased, a reward for agree-ability.” 

Shit. I was a nice girl.

I derived my value from the favorable opinions of others. I craved validation. I learned I had purpose when I was needed so I bent and molded myself to fit whatever was required, no matter the personal cost. I forgot to have an opinion or if I did, I always bit my tongue. I really was “agreeable”, the word, now tasting like soap on my tongue. I enabled poor behavior and allowed myself to be trampled over as others passed me by.

Instead, I wanted to be Kind. “Kind is something we own. Something we enact, instead of something we fulfill. Kind is something we can decide about ourselves”

To be kind is to speak truthfully, to stand up to injustice. To have boundaries and respect for others, but most importantly, yourself. To be kind is powerful. To be kind is to show up in your own life, take up space and in turn make space for other to do the same. Kindness has the power to change the world, niceness, promotes the status quo • “The next time you feel pressure to say yes when you want to say no. Next time you feel subservient or small. Look in the mirror and tell yourself that you are a Kind Woman.

I am a Kind Woman. 🔥

What did you learn before age 30? (P.s. You don’t have to be 30 to share 😘)

Hey, I’m Caitlin!
Multi-Passionate Entrepreneur, Life Coach, Wedding Coach, Yoga Teacher, artist, garden designer, and beekeeper, dedicated to helping you create the authentic, fulfilling, and passion-driven life you want to live.
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